Just before I left the coffee shop, two women came in with six children, all 10 or younger—most in the 5- to 7-year-old range, it looked. The adults parked all the kids in a large booth near my table and the kids immediately started talking at high volume about The Important Topics of the Day.
In no particular order:
- Toys R Us is a cool store, and they have a birthday program where you get a free present for your birthday, and [pause for hasty breath] I don't know what the present is yet but maybe it's one of those cool VISA things, you know the cards like Mom uses to buy us toys?
- Shoes are hard to tie but Velcro shoes are just nerdy, and those ones that light up are kinda cool but the kids at school think they're sorta dorky so I don't wear mine anymore but I can't tie my new shoes. [breath] But I'm learning how tomorrow! [wild applause from the adults listening intently from nearby tables]
- It tickles really bad when you get your toenails cut, but it's kinda funny too, but it's hard to stay still and Mom has to say "Sit still!" like maybe 200 times cuz it tickles so much.
- I don't like vegetable soup and chicken noodle's okay but I really like black-bean soup and it gives you good burps.
- So what do you think you get from Toys R Us for your birthday?
- What kind of bread is this? It tastes funny.
- Pokémon's so stupid now. I have all the cards and the toys and the shoes and sox and two t-shirts but I never got the belt but [breath] I don't want the belt now because I never wear the other stuff and it's all so lame.
- I didn't wan't black-bean soup. I told you I wanted chicken noodle!
Et cetera. This all took place in about 40 seconds, which is maybe an eighth as long as it took me to type it up.
Kids talk fast.